The Last Time

I stand here frozen from fear formerly felt.
I do not see through my eyes the two doors in front of me welcoming me to a new life.
My memories of you are flashing fiercely from the eyes of my heart.
I let you in.
I told you my sorrows.
I gave you my heart.
I stayed by your side.
I caressed you in my hands.

I loved you.

You pretended to care.
You pretended to love.
When we become one:
You hurt me.
You abused me.
You used me.
You cheated on me.

You didn't love me.

Then I found him.
He is different.
He is real.
He cares.
He listens.
He tells me his sorrows.
I tell him mine.
We were both abused
both used.
We both are broken.
We both take it slow.
We still haven't kissed, but we both know.
This is real.
This isn't fake.

I think of you, and I want to run.
I want to be chained to never be loved.
Then I think of him, and I smile.
It's time to move on.
Time to open up.
To let him in as I once let you.

I open the doors wide open.
I am ready to walk down the aisle for the last time.